3 reasons a good book is the most fun you are having in bed.
Sexual problems, even in the happiest of relationships, can happen for a myriad of reasons. Loss of libido can be due to stress, a new baby, fatigue, or be a sign of an underlying medical problem like reduced hormone levels. Certain medications like the contraceptive pill or certain antidepressants, have also been linked with reduced sex drive in some women.
Here are 3 reasons a good book may be the most fun you are having in bed. And some ideas on how to fix it.
Depression can be all-consuming and affect our ability to laugh, work, take care of ourselves and our partners. It is a disorder that has the ability to infiltrate a person’s existence entirely. For those affected, having depression means more than just feeling blue; it can cause a broad range of symptoms including sexual health problems.
Because sex thrives on intimacy, if you are depressed, let your partner in by sharing your thoughts and feelings. Talk to your partner about how your depression is affecting your sexual health. Open communication may not automatically resolve the issue, but it can help lighten feelings of guilt and worthlessness. Your readiness to be open and vulnerable can actually increase intimacy. A deeper connection can lead to an increase in desire and more resiliency with depression in other parts of your life too.
Hormonal changes in men and women is a common reason for a drop in libido. For instance, during the menstrual cycle, fluctuating hormones can result in bloating, tiredness, and aches and pains, which can contribute to a dive in sexual interest. Getting older can also cause a decrease in testosterone, a hormone known to be linked with desire. While testosterone is normally associated with males, it exists in females at lower levels.
With hormones a powerful game-changer, addressing its symptoms is vital when addressing a loss of libido in both men and women.
WelleCo Super Boosters Men’s Libido + Endurance is a herbal formula containing extracts and traditionally used herbs to support prostate health, sperm motility and libido while promoting energy and stamina. Active ingredients include Flower Pollen extract for supporting prostate health and nutrients rich in amino acids, minerals, vitamins and carotenoids. Horny Goat Weed supports a healthy libido and stamina, and Maca Extract enhances energy levels and promotes a healthy libido as well as maintain reproductive system health.
Women’s Libido + Hormone Support is a medicinal blend of herbs and adaptogens to assist with balancing hormones naturally and enhancing energy and libido. Black Cohosh Extract is added to help maintain healthy hormone balance and relieve the symptoms of menopause, Red Raspberry Leaf supports female cycles and hormonal shifts, and Maca Root promotes energy, a healthy libido and sexual function.
“The powerful herb Maca (Lepidum meyenii) has consistently been shown to increase estradiol in menopausal women, and helps with insomnia, depression, memory, concentration, energy, hot flashes, and vaginal dryness, as well as improved body mass index and bone density,” says WelleCo Advisory Board member Sara Gottfried, MD in her book, The Hormone Cure. “Additionally, Maca has been shown to improve libido and to lower anxiety and depression, all of which are symptoms of low estrogen. It has been shown to help with the sexual side effects of a type of antidepressant called selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI). The common dose is 2,000 mg/day.”
Communication about sexual issues is one of the hardest challenges faced by many couples. During sex, the best type of communication is clear, honest and sensitive. Let your partner know what is working and remind them why you have feelings for them. Perhaps “I've noticed that this is happening (mention the problem) and I'm wondering how you feel about it?" Inferring that the issue is a shared one means they won’t feel the problem is theirs alone and something to work on as a couple.
Before you start talking about sex, agree to aim to be as open-minded and nonjudgmental as possible with each other. Understanding what your partner wants is not an analysis of your sex life, but instead a journey to discovering new and even more pleasurable intimacy.
Key to a more satisfying sexual relationship is your willingness to express your needs and listen to your partners. Clarify what works now in your relationship, what you’d like to see change and what you both really desire. Find out what will please each of you romantically and between the sheets and don’t be afraid to ask for them. This can be an intimidating step for a lot of people. Many couples rarely talk about sex, let alone speak openly about their sexual desires, but with open communication, the possibilities of a satisfying sex life only multiply. Planning doesn’t eliminate spontaneity, it just increases the chances of having more meaningful and loving encounters.